Here Comes the Sun

I took my dog for a walk today, and it was fairly warm out, so I wore shorts. It was only then that I noticed how disturbingly pale my legs are. In fact, they've shot so far past pale that they're practically translucent. You can see veins and everything. Ugh.

Now in general, I like my body. I have a pretty good figure, if I don't say so myself. And I know that 'pale is the new tan' (what does that even MEAN?), and that going tanning increases your risk of skin cancer, and all that. I know these things. But still, when I am getting out of the shower and being confronted by Narnia's White Queen in the mirror (I thought about saying Casper the Friendly Ghost, then realised what an unflattering comparison that would be. At least the White Queen isn't quite so shapeless.), it kind of gets to me. I'm so self-conscious about it that I usually don't even wear shorts if I can get away with it.

I know, I know. I'm vain. And this problem is easily remedied enough. But I'm not laying out in my bikini because I *hate* tanlines (the ridiculous tanlines I would get from working summer camp in a Boy Scout uniform were absolutely intolerable). I don't want white boobs and a white butt. And besides that, I would need to spend $100 to get the keycard so I can access the pool in my apartment. $100!? Seriously!? If I had that kind of money to blow I would just go tanning in a salon!

For now I have settled for a bottle of Dove self-tanner that I had purchased last summer but didn't use much. Here's hoping it doesn't turn me orange...I would be crushed if I ended up looking like Lisa.